13 Books on How to Not Be a Terrible Person

September 8 2016
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Many will thumb their noses at straight-up self-help books—and yet, like me, they still need a lot of guidance on how to not be a total jerk in this world. For my dear, dear friends such as this, I’ve collected some of my favorite books that may advise in that arena.

Works Well with Others
by Ross McCammon

Here’s a helpful book on how to not be a terrible person at work—I swear I’m working on it, my dear colleagues, please have patience! This brilliant, honest, and funny career guide details everything you need to know about being nice, getting sh*t done, and advancing your career.

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Works Well with Others
Ross McCammon

Here’s a helpful book on how to not be a terrible person at work—I swear I’m working on it, my dear colleagues, please have patience! This brilliant, honest, and funny career guide details everything you need to know about being nice, getting sh*t done, and advancing your career.

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So You've Been Publicly Shamed
by Jon Ronson

Swarms of anonymous reputation assassins are ready and waiting to ruin your life—thanks, Twitter! SO YOU’VE BEEN PUBLICLY SHAMED examines how modern public shaming can be a form of social control, where punishments often outweigh the crimes, and where there are (ironically) no consequences for anonymous commenters.

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So You've Been Publicly Shamed
Jon Ronson

Swarms of anonymous reputation assassins are ready and waiting to ruin your life—thanks, Twitter! SO YOU’VE BEEN PUBLICLY SHAMED examines how modern public shaming can be a form of social control, where punishments often outweigh the crimes, and where there are (ironically) no consequences for anonymous commenters.

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MENTIONED IN:

13 Books on How to Not Be a Terrible Person

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F*ck Feelings
by Michael Bennett, MD and Sarah Bennett

In a nutshell, F*CK FEELINGS teaches you that if you can maintain a sense of humor, adjust your expectations, and let go of unproductive feelings, you can get through life all right. Added bonus? The book begins: “Given life’s cruelty and unfairness, F*CK FEELINGS believes profanity is a source of comfort, clarity, and strength.” A-f*cking-men.

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F*ck Feelings
Michael Bennett, MD and Sarah Bennett

In a nutshell, F*CK FEELINGS teaches you that if you can maintain a sense of humor, adjust your expectations, and let go of unproductive feelings, you can get through life all right. Added bonus? The book begins: “Given life’s cruelty and unfairness, F*CK FEELINGS believes profanity is a source of comfort, clarity, and strength.” A-f*cking-men.

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13 Books on How to Not Be a Terrible Person

By Erica Nelson | September 8, 2016

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Yes Please
by Amy Poehler

From “Saturday Night Live” to “Parks and Recreation,” I think Amy Poehler is absolutely hilarious. We could all learn a thing or two from her humor and positive attitude towards life. If I were you, I’d say “yes, please” to her smart, pointed, and ultimately inspirational book full of stories, lists, poetry, photos, mantras, and advice.

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Yes Please
Amy Poehler

A comedic genius, actress, media darling, and all-around-awesome lady, Amy Poehler is beloved by her peers and fans for her realness, her integrity, and her intelligence. Her memoir is powered by the charming and hilarious, biting yet wise voice that has made her the celebrity best friend that most people dream of.

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Hyperbole and a Half
by Allie Brosh

Allie Brosh's graphic memoir conveys the everyday realities of living with social anxiety in a way this world has never seen before. I've witnessed her humorous anecdotes cultivate compassion (and a smile) in even the most cold-hearted individuals (myself included).

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Hyperbole and a Half
Allie Brosh

“I have read very few books in my life that compelled me to laugh so loudly in public that it made the people around me visibly uncomfortable. Allie Brosh’s HYPERBOLE AND A HALF is one of them.”

Read Sarah Jane Abbott’s review here.

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Adulting
by Kelly Williams Brown

I am frequently in awe of how, after years of schooling, I could still be so tremendously unequipped to be an adult. (For real, what is a hedge fund? How do you fix a toilet? Asking for a friend…) Luckily, ADULTING teaches you how to conquer the “real world” with practical advice that makes the confusing rules and regulations of adulthood more manageable.

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Adulting
Kelly Williams Brown

I am frequently in awe of how, after years of schooling, I could still be so tremendously unequipped to be an adult. (For real, what is a hedge fund? How do you fix a toilet? Asking for a friend…) Luckily, ADULTING teaches you how to conquer the “real world” with practical advice that makes the confusing rules and regulations of adulthood more manageable.

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MENTIONED IN:

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The Artist's Way
by Julia Cameron

THE ARTIST’S WAY is one of my favorite books about creativity and has served me well as a guide to living a life full of inspiration and reflection. It’s full of practical suggestions for how to overcome pesky annoyances that typically make people terrible—like fear, self-sabotage, and jealousy—through trying new things and writing daily.

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The Artist's Way
Julia Cameron

THE ARTIST’S WAY is one of my favorite books about creativity and has served me well as a guide to living a life full of inspiration and reflection. It’s full of practical suggestions for how to overcome pesky annoyances that typically make people terrible—like fear, self-sabotage, and jealousy—through trying new things and writing daily.

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MENTIONED IN:

13 Books on How to Not Be a Terrible Person

By Erica Nelson | September 8, 2016

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Let's Pretend This Never Happened
by Jenny Lawson

There are plenty of things I’ve done that I wish never happened. Try as I might to bury the memories, Jenny Lawson has set me straight with her incredibly insightful and hilarious advice. However bad those experiences, they are just as much a part of what makes me, me, as the best experiences of my life.

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Let's Pretend This Never Happened
Jenny Lawson

When Jenny Lawson was little, all she ever wanted was to fit in. That dream was cut short by her fantastically unbalanced father and a morbidly eccentric childhood. It did, however, open up an opportunity for Lawson to find the humor in the strange shame-spiral that is her life, and we are all the better for it.

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Reasons to Stay Alive
by Matt Haig

Even if you personally don’t suffer from depression, it’s likely that a friend or loved one does—and one key to not being a terrible person is having the ability to empathize with them. A good way to dust off that dormant area of your brain where "feelings" and "empathy" live is to read REASONS TO STAY ALIVE. It's Matt Haig's inspiring account of how he overcame the disease and found that there was, in fact, light at the end of the tunnel of depression.

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Reasons to Stay Alive
Matt Haig

Even if you personally don’t suffer from depression, it’s likely that a friend or loved one does—and one key to not being a terrible person is having the ability to empathize with them. A good way to dust off that dormant area of your brain where "feelings" and "empathy" live is to read REASONS TO STAY ALIVE. It's Matt Haig's inspiring account of how he overcame the disease and found that there was, in fact, light at the end of the tunnel of depression.

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MENTIONED IN:

13 Books on How to Not Be a Terrible Person

By Erica Nelson | September 8, 2016

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How to Be a Woman
by Caitlin Moran

I’ve never been a fan of unsolicited advice about how women should act. Thankfully, the title of this book is tongue-in-cheek—and what Caitlin Moran really does is shatter all of the stereotypes about what being a modern woman means. That’s one more nail in the coffin of outdated advice on what women should do or say or think.

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How to Be a Woman
Caitlin Moran

I’ve never been a fan of unsolicited advice about how women should act. Thankfully, the title of this book is tongue-in-cheek—and what Caitlin Moran really does is shatter all of the stereotypes about what being a modern woman means. That’s one more nail in the coffin of outdated advice on what women should do or say or think.

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MENTIONED IN:

13 Books on How to Not Be a Terrible Person

By Erica Nelson | September 8, 2016

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Modern Romance
by Aziz Ansari and Eric Klinenberg

Have you become soulless and jaded after one too many terrible OKCupid dates? Welcome to the club—but don’t get too comfortable. If you need a kick in the butt to get back in the game, pick up a copy of MODERN ROMANCE and prepare yourself for a hilarious and extremely thoughtful exploration of the pleasures and perils of modern romance.

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Modern Romance
Aziz Ansari and Eric Klinenberg

Aziz Ansari blew my mind with his fresh meditation on dating, so accurate and affirming of all my trials and tribulations navigating the harrowing dating scene in New York City that it brought me to tears. Well, maybe not real tears, but my eyes were definitely watering as I attempted to hold back audible snorts of laughter while reading it on the subway.

Read Hilary Krutt’s review here.

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You Are a Badass
by Jen Sincero

In this refreshingly feisty how-to guide, world-traveling success coach Jen Sincero serves up hilarious and bite-sized inspiration and advice on how to kick ass—and how to actually be as confident on the inside as you appear on the outside. If you’re looking to be the HBIC (Head B*tch in Charge) of your life, you’re going to want to use YOU ARE A BADASS as your bible.

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You Are a Badass
Jen Sincero

In this refreshingly feisty how-to guide, world-traveling success coach Jen Sincero serves up hilarious and bite-sized inspiration and advice on how to kick ass—and how to actually be as confident on the inside as you appear on the outside. If you’re looking to be the HBIC (Head B*tch in Charge) of your life, you’re going to want to use YOU ARE A BADASS as your bible.

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MENTIONED IN:

13 Books on How to Not Be a Terrible Person

By Erica Nelson | September 8, 2016

Close
Nice Is Just a Place in France
by The Betches

After having spent an obscene amount of time on The Betches Insta, I knew I had to read their book NICE IS JUST A PLACE IN FRANCE. This is a take-no-prisoners book of advice for young women on “how to win at basically everything.” I can confidently say that it delivers—it’s funny, it’s practical, and it’s absolutely brutal.

Shout-out to one of my favorite Instas of all time. #LifeGoals

Nice try

A photo posted by BETCHES (@betches) on

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Nice Is Just a Place in France
The Betches

After having spent an obscene amount of time on The Betches Insta, I knew I had to read their book NICE IS JUST A PLACE IN FRANCE. This is a take-no-prisoners book of advice for young women on “how to win at basically everything.” I can confidently say that it delivers—it’s funny, it’s practical, and it’s absolutely brutal.

Shout-out to one of my favorite Instas of all time. #LifeGoals

Nice try

A photo posted by BETCHES (@betches) on

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MENTIONED IN:

13 Books on How to Not Be a Terrible Person

By Erica Nelson | September 8, 2016

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